“Snooki is pregnant, Dick Clark is dead and therefore can’t do the New Year’s countdown, the Octomom is doing porn, Kristen Stewart is Hollywood’s highest-paid actress, Dan Harmon was fired as showrunner of Community, Charles Barkley is on a diet, there’s going to be a college football playoff, and a dude ate another dude’s face off — at what point do we stop making ‘the Mayans were right’ jokes and start taking this thing seriously?”
